This isn’t fiction. It happened a few days ago and it has been popping into my head from time to time. So I thought, why not write about it. And now we’re here. Anyway, here’s the gist.
So, our morning sessions at the gym typically start at 7.30am. But on this day, I got there early. I had a ton of meetings scheduled for the day and I wanted to get my workout done as early as possible and start my day. I got to the gym at 7am, went inside and found it ‘empty’ and dark.
I say empty because as far as I could tell, there was no one there. So I went to the light switch and turned on all the lights at once. And I tell you, it was blinding!
That was when I heard scrambling. I saw someone run into the bathroom and another person get up and start to put on their clothes. It was my trainer; putting on his clothes with such ease and confidence. He looked at me, smiled and said ‘Good morning, you’re early today.’
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Was I Shocked?
Omo!, I was shocked but I had to maintain my chill. So, I greeted him and went on to do my warm-up like what just happened was the most normal occurrence in the world.
At this point, I still didn’t know who the lady was who had run into the bathroom but I was sure I would find out soon. You see, it’s a small gym. She can’t come out of the bathroom without being seen. So I started my workout programs for the day and waited to see her. Don’t judge me. You would be curious too.
About 20 minutes later, she comes out of the bathroom all showered and dressed. And my imaginary jaw dropped. It was a babe from the gym. Like, she works out with us. I smiled internally because in my head I was thinking ‘Okay, girl. Get it.’
But then I noticed she was…embarrassed. I mean, who wouldn’t be. She got caught having sex at the gym.
I’m sure they thought they had a few minutes left before people started coming to the gym, but hey, it is a tad embarrassing. I also noticed that my trainer went about his morning routine like nothing happened. He cracked jokes and did his trainer shenanigans without an iota of awkwardness.
The babe, on the other hand, absolutely refused to meet my gaze. Not that I was starring. Again, it’s a small gym. There’s only so many things one can look at.
It struck me then that women are used to feeling ashamed and embarrassed for having a sexual appetite and engaging in sexcapades. For most men, it is a thing of pride. Something to boast about even. And I am not surprised by this.
ALSO READ: 5 Ways To Understand Your Partner’s Love Languages
For centuries, society has perpetuated the notion that a woman’s sexuality should be confined within rigid boundaries. The deeply ingrained cultural norms often dictate that women should suppress their sexual appetites, leaving many feeling a profound sense of shame or guilt for embracing their desires. This burden of shame is ingrained from an early age.
Societal constructs often instil the idea that women should be demure, modest, and passive when it comes to their sexuality. This conditioning leads to an internalised shame for those who dare to explore and enjoy their sexual identity freely.
It shouldn’t be though.
It is important that we challenge these stereotypes and dismantle the shame associated with women’s sexual appetites. I mean, women deserve pleasurable sexual experiences too na. Sexual desires are a natural and fundamental part of human nature, regardless of gender. Instead of perpetuating shame, we should encourage open discussions, creating safe spaces for women to explore and understand their desires without judgement.
How can we do this?
Education plays a pivotal role in fostering a culture of sexual empowerment. Offering comprehensive sex education that encompasses consent, pleasure, and the diversity of sexual experiences can empower women to embrace their desires confidently.
Understanding that sexual preferences vary greatly and that each individual has the autonomy to explore their desires without judgement is a step towards sexual liberation.
Now, I’m not saying we should all go about having sex at the gym. The point here is that women deserve the agency to make choices regarding their bodies and sexual encounters without fear of judgement. Empowerment comes from owning one’s sexuality, acknowledging desires, and engaging in consensual experiences free from judgement or condemnation.
ALSO READ: My Sexual Partner is Too Big for Me – What Can I Do?
Destigmatizing Sexcapades
The term “sexcapades” often carries a negative connotation, particularly when associated with women. We need to reframe these experiences as a celebration of sexual autonomy and exploration. When we encourage open dialogue devoid of judgement, it allows women to share their experiences without shame, fostering a community where sexual expression is embraced, respected, and understood.
Breaking the shackles of shame surrounding women’s sexual desires requires collective effort. We need to challenge societal norms, create inclusive spaces, and promote healthy, consensual sexual exploration for women without the burden of shame or guilt. This is a key aspect of what we do in the Sex and Intimacy community on Fusion.
Our goal is to encourage sexual liberation and this starts with conversations that shatter the stigma and allow women to embrace their desires unapologetically. Join in on the conversation today, let’s create a future where women feel empowered to express their sexualities authentically.
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