So Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Do you have plans?
Before you tell me to mind my business, hear me out first. Check your DMs… I’m sure there’s someone that has been itching to go on a date with you and you’ve been forming hard guy and playing hard-to-get. Why not take a leap of faith and go on that date.
When you get there, please don’t stick to the regular and basic banter you’re used to o. You’re there with an agenda and it’s time to agend. You need to ask the right questions.
Your style of communication will help you know if you share similar values and beliefs with someone and this can help you connect with them better. But for communication to yield the desired results, both parties need to be honest. Lying is far worse than no communication at all.
So, on that first date, it would be great to have a healthy and honest communication with them.
What are some questions to ask on the first date and why do they matter?
Let’s find out.
Are you wanted by the police?
Don’t even ask me why you need to ask this. You’re coming in hot because you need to know if you’re dealing with a felon or a terrorist. Trust me, you don’t want the Olops (normal olopa nau) breaking down your door the next day because the person they’re looking for was last seen with you eating bols and fish (normal bole and fish nau).
Are you Religious/How religious are you?
This is one of the most important questions to ask on the first date. You need to know if you’re on the same page spiritually. Maybe you’re a traditionalist and she’s a church-goer. Just like that, you’ve achieved spiritual two-factor authentication if you decide to become a couple. Demons and evil spirits are shaking!
Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
It’s important to ask that question because it can help you understand how your partner prefers to interact with the world and how they prefer to vibe. Introverts typically recharge their energy by spending time alone, while extroverts get their energy from spending time with others. If you know where your date falls on this spectrum, you can better understand their preferences for unwinding.
Are you a Vampire or a Mami Wota?
You need to know who you’re dealing with and if you’re up against any forces of evil so that either you get some backup or you call it a day.
(For those of you who want to use Prince Eric and Ariel as a case for argument, I must remind you that Ariel was a mermaid and not a mami wota. They are not the same thing).
What are your fashion choices?
Do they have steez like TG Omori or Toyin Lawani? Or are they gracefully stylish like Ebuka or Genevieve Nnaji? Maybe they are sprinkle of both? Just make sure you know what their fashion choices are so that when you have to go out together, it will not be a case of Surprise, Surprise…🎶
Are you an early bird or a night owl?
Perhaps you like to wake up early and bond before going about the day’s activìties and they may prefer to sleep in? Or maybe you like going to bed early and they get the drive to get things done late into night?
(Am I the only one who thinks that being productive at night when you’re not a security man or a health worker is cultist and witch behaviour? Just me? Okay).
This needs to be communicated so you can know if there will be a need for some compromise.
Do you rinse your brush before applying toothpaste or do you apply toothpaste before rinsing your brush?
This question gives you insight into how they approach life. If they rinse before applying the toothpaste then they are always on guard and alert to their surroundings. But if they apply toothpaste before rinsing their brush then they are not afraid to take risks.
Do you sleep with the light on or off?
For those of you that went to boarding school, you know the trauma that comes with sleeping with the lights off. So, find out if they’re the weapon fashioned against you by asking if they sleep with lights on or off.
What are your expectations of me?
A relationship where both individuals have high expectations of each other will quickly end in disappointment. So ask about their expectations of you from the very first date.
Let it not be after somebody has bought your forty thousand naira asoebi and booked an Uber of twelve thousand naira to attend your wedding, you and your partner will now say you are getting a divorce after 6 months. Just because your husband expects you to wake up by 3 am to pound yam that he will take to work and you refuse because you don’t take sleep for granted.
In this economy? You have to refund our money o.
What’s on your bucket list?
For your own sake, please ask. So that it isn’t when you’re already married you’ll find out that they have ‘go skydiving and bungee jumping with my partner’ as items on their bucket list when you are someone who is terribly afraid of heights. Ask now so that you can dust your slippers and run if necessary.
The dating world is a jungle. But you can be successful if you know the right questions to ask on the first date. You’ll be able to have healthy communication with your date. Join the Dating and Relationship community on Fusion for more tips, fun events and exciting banter.
Ehen, what other questions will you be asking on that date? Let me know in the comments.
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