How To Know When To Leave A Party

Knowing when to leave a party, especially young people’s party, is an art; a fine blend of social cues, personal comfort/boundaries and common sense. This is because these kids will test you and push at the borders of your boundaries in the name of loosening up. 

Attending a party these days is one thing, enjoying the party all the way to the end is an extreme sport. It would seem as if the longer the time you spend at the party, the dumber the ideas of fun things people come up with as if they are in a competition for the dumbest man alive trophy. Funny thing is if you refuse to join them/cooperate with them, they’ll say you are too uptight and you need to loosen up a bit. The other day, my colleague was gisting me about a party that started out with sane people and somewhere along the line, they started moving inappropriately (like yo! Where are the sane guys this party started with?). Here are some cues you need to look out for on knowing when to leave a party

When you start hearing, “I believe we’re all adults here..”

One cannot even attend a party these days without being subtly coerced into doing things you had no plans of doing. Seriously friends, when making plans to attend a party these days, you should make a list of games you will not join in/things you will not do as well as map out an exit strategy because it’s how they switch up regular parties to house parties in the blink of an eye. Like, wait a minute guys! How did we get here? Now you’re trying to patronize me by saying, “I believe we’re all adults here, yen yen yen….”  Excuse me, who told you I’m an adult? I attended a young people’s party. How did I become an adult by spending some hours at your party? Nah, I’m going home to my mother. I’ll leave the rest of the activities to the adults in the room. 

When they switch the lights off

You see this particular stunt of switching the lights off or changing the light color to blue or red is a no-brainer. It’s almost as old as civilization. I remember growing up to know that some light (bulb) colors are “ungodly.” My grandma would tell us that “evil activities” (please don’t ask me what the evil activities are because I didn’t remember to ask 😂🤣) happen wherever they use blue or red lights…lol. Even as an adult, I can tell that the light (bulb) color used in clubs and brothels is a mix of these two and maybe throw in some green too. So, once you notice the light colors have been switched and they’re trying to achieve the club feel, don’t just walk away, run, even better, flee! 

When you start hearing, “Let’s play truth or dare”

At this point, it’s hard to tell if power holding is a friend or foe because they seem to be enabling these culprits. Except you’re off grid, we all know that power must be “held.” So, most hosts always have a backup plan but when the gen goes off due to fuel exhaustion. My dear, just pack your bags and leave the party, you have tried! Before all these people that have lost sight of heaven start drumming up all shades of creative ideas to lead you straight to hell in the twinkle of an eye. I don’t understand why we’ll agree to play a game of truth or dare and of all the questions you could have asked me (about my passion, goals, ambition, drive, etc), you chose to ask for my body count or you dare me to take off ten cloth items (blinks in nudity). How many cloth items do I have on? Am I a masquerade? Y’all play too much!

When they start serving Cookies and Candy or Cake

We can all agree that apart from music, the next item on the “life of the party” list is the food or snacks. But it is not every snack that’s shared at a party you should eat, especially when they share cookies, candies or cake. See ehn, if you don’t want to be caught doing stuff that can bring disrepute to your family name, just locate the nearest exit and be on your merry way once they start sharing these things as snacks in a party.  

Don’t get me wrong, candy, cookies and cakes are great snacking options but not in every party. Sometimes, they have been laced with hard drugs and just one piece is enough to help you “loosen up” enough to do stupid stuff, but because it is very sweet, you might not be able to stop at one. The funny part is while handing you any of these snacks, they’ll tell you, “Say no to drugs” and you’ll be wondering what they mean.

When the music changes

The type of music that’s played at a party can tell a lot about the kind of people at the party. Afrobeat music is all the rave now. Once you hear Afrobeat music, you can almost confirm that the party is for young people. When the music changes from that to slow paced sensual songs, and it’s not that a couple are having their first or whatever dance, just know that something’s about to go down and this my friend would be a good time to put your legs to good use. Don’t wait to get tempted to try out your twerking/rocking skills, just move. 

When you know getting home by yourself might become difficult

You don’t have a car and it’s getting late, and the later it gets, the more difficult it could be to order a ride on any of the hailing platforms and someone you met at the party has promised to drop you off even though your house is off their route. *I laugh in one night stand*

If heaven is still the goal, now’s a good time to leave. Please leave that place asap! I know you’re an adult and all but this is exactly how people have found themselves in other people’s houses chopping early morning breakfast before their ship even sailed. Let’s not even start what we cannot finish please, except of course you’re looking to get a lil’ something…..I don’t want to hear any funny story. 

Parties are as memorable as the amount of fun you had but I hope that these few points of mine will save you from being the potential victim of the next regular party turned house party. Truth is parties don’t have to last forever and we don’t have to engage in indecent stuff before we have fun.

Did I miss out on any of the warning signals? Tell me about it in the “Dating and Relationship” Community on Fusion. See ya!