As a Nigerian adult, you know December isn’t just a festive season; it’s the unofficial billing Olympics.
From matching aso-ebi for your partner’s cousin’s wedding, to paying for office hangout, to buying gifts for friends and family, to concert tickets and “detty December” plans, there’s always something demanding your hard-earned money.
It’s as if the universe is conspiring with sapa to make sure your January is full of shege. But fear not, because I have curated a guide to dodging these bills like the pro “shege survivor” you are. Let’s get into it!
Always Complain Like It’s Your Birthright
Nobody wants to bill someone who complains every five minutes.
When you make it a point of duty to complain about your financial situation every time you get a chance, the likelihood of getting billed will be next to impossible, except you have heartless people with PhDs in audacity around you, and for those, there’s step two..
Trade Your Flashy Phone for a ‘Torchlight’
See those your big phones that attract unnecessary attention, that your iPhone 14 Pro Max? It’s a walking billboard for billing.
Sell it and invest the money in preparation for next year’s shege. That way, nobody will suspect you’re a “billionaire in transit.”
Get a humble Nokia torchlight or TECNO that screams ‘leave me alone.’ Imagine someone asking for money while you’re using a phone that looks like it belongs in 2003. Exactly. They might even pity you and dash you money.
Buy Okrika Clothes
Like they always say at the “Okrika” stores, na mumu dey go boutique! Save your bank account the headache of buying designer clothes that will easily give you away as the next big thing in town and attract billing.
Buy “Okrika” wears and make it a point of duty to announce to everyone that cares to listen whenever they compliment you. You can say things like, “You’ll never believe how much/where I bought this outfit, it’s just 500 Naira o!”
Don’t forget to throw in that line about “making do with the little you have…” Nobody will dare ask you to contribute to any extravagant expenses when you’ve positioned yourself as the king or queen of thrift.
Avoid Calls Like a Pro
Screen all calls! That call from your cousin in the village? You know it’s not “Merry Christmas” they’re about to say but “I need money for New Year.”
Activate DND (Do Not Disturb) and return only those you’re certain will not end up billing you, and if you must respond, use WhatsApp texts where you can carefully craft excuses.
Go Solo: Break Up With Your Partner
Let’s keep it real. Being in a relationship is the major source of billing in December. Cut it off and enjoy the peace of mind that comes with being single!
Enjoy your money alone, you worked hard for it! Plus, you get bonus points for entering January without emotional or financial baggage.
RELATED: 4 Reasons Why You Should Stay Single In December
You’re not sure how to do that? Stay tuned for my next article where I’ll be providing you with updates on how to serve breakfast in December.
Dodging bills in December isn’t just about saving money; it’s about maintaining your sanity and starting January without having to sell your kidney.
Try these strategies, and watch how your December becomes peaceful and financially secure. Just remember to thank me when you’re sipping zobo in your house instead of crying in debt recovery meetings.
If you loved these tips and you’d like to get more, join the Dating and Relationship community on Fusion. But don’t go and fall in love in December o!
338 Responses
Respect to article author, some excellent entropy.
Good – I should definitely pronounce, impressed with your site. I had no trouble navigating through all tabs and related info ended up being truly easy to do to access. I recently found what I hoped for before you know it at all. Quite unusual. Is likely to appreciate it for those who add forums or something, website theme . a tones way for your client to communicate. Excellent task..
womens viagra
The cosmos is said to be an ordered place, ruled by laws and principles, yet within that order exists chaos, unpredictability, and the unexpected. Perhaps true balance is not about eliminating chaos but embracing it, learning to see the beauty in disorder, the harmony within the unpredictable. Maybe to truly understand the universe, we must stop trying to control it and simply become one with its rhythm.
I like your writing style truly enjoying this site.
great post, very informative. I wonder why the other experts of this sector don’t notice this. You must continue your writing. I’m sure, you’ve a great readers’ base already!
There’s certainly a lot to learn about this topic. I really like all the points you made.
Nice post. I learn something more challenging on different blogs everyday. It will always be stimulating to read content from other writers and practice a little something from their store. I’d prefer to use some with the content on my blog whether you don’t mind. Natually I’ll give you a link on your web blog. Thanks for sharing.
Hi there, You’ve done a fantastic job. I will certainly digg it and for my part recommend to my friends. I am confident they will be benefited from this site.
I want to show some appreciation to the writer for bailing me out of this condition. Right after checking through the world wide web and seeing recommendations that were not pleasant, I was thinking my life was over. Existing without the presence of answers to the issues you’ve sorted out by means of your main short article is a crucial case, and the kind which may have adversely damaged my career if I hadn’t noticed your site. Your personal capability and kindness in maneuvering almost everything was priceless. I don’t know what I would have done if I hadn’t come across such a point like this. I can at this moment relish my future. Thank you so much for your skilled and effective guide. I won’t think twice to refer your blog to anybody who needs guide about this subject.
Greetings! I know this is kinda off topic but I’d figured I’d ask. Would you be interested in exchanging links or maybe guest writing a blog article or vice-versa? My website addresses a lot of the same topics as yours and I think we could greatly benefit from each other. If you happen to be interested feel free to shoot me an e-mail. I look forward to hearing from you! Great blog by the way!
This web site is really a walk-through for all of the info you wanted about this and didn’t know who to ask. Glimpse here, and you’ll definitely discover it.
Nice post. I study something tougher on different blogs everyday. It is going to always be stimulating to learn content from different writers and follow a little one thing from their store. I’d favor to use some with the content on my weblog whether or not you don’t mind. Natually I’ll give you a link in your net blog. Thanks for sharing.
I?¦ve been exploring for a bit for any high-quality articles or blog posts on this kind of house . Exploring in Yahoo I eventually stumbled upon this web site. Reading this information So i am happy to exhibit that I have a very good uncanny feeling I discovered exactly what I needed. I most for sure will make certain to don?¦t disregard this web site and provides it a look regularly.
Thanks for helping out, great information. “Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.” by Tallulah Bankhead.
Just desire to say your article is as astounding. The clearness in your publish is simply cool and that i can suppose you are an expert in this subject. Well together with your permission let me to snatch your feed to stay updated with imminent post. Thanks one million and please continue the rewarding work.
You have brought up a very superb details , thankyou for the post.
I have been checking out some of your posts and i can state pretty clever stuff. I will definitely bookmark your blog.
Attractive element of content. I simply stumbled upon your blog and in accession capital to say that I get actually enjoyed account your blog posts. Any way I will be subscribing in your feeds and even I success you access constantly rapidly.
I conceive you have mentioned some very interesting details , thankyou for the post.
Great write-up, I¦m normal visitor of one¦s site, maintain up the nice operate, and It is going to be a regular visitor for a lengthy time.
As soon as I found this website I went on reddit to share some of the love with them.
Hello. fantastic job. I did not expect this. This is a great story. Thanks!
Your blog has quickly become one of my favorites I always look forward to your new posts and the insights they offer
It is appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I have read this post and if I may just I desire to recommend you some attention-grabbing things or tips. Maybe you could write next articles relating to this article. I wish to learn even more things approximately it!
Excellent blog here! Also your web site loads up very fast! What web host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my website loaded up as fast as yours lol
I will right away grab your rss as I can not to find your e-mail subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you have any? Kindly allow me realize in order that I may just subscribe. Thanks.
Very interesting information!Perfect just what I was searching for!
I got good info from your blog
Lovely just what I was searching for.Thanks to the author for taking his clock time on this one.
obviously like your web site but you have to check the spelling on several of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling problems and I find it very bothersome to tell the truth nevertheless I’ll surely come back again.
You have brought up a very fantastic details, regards for the post.
I’m really impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your weblog. Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself? Anyway keep up the nice quality writing, it is rare to see a nice blog like this one nowadays..
Your style is so unique compared to many other people. Thank you for publishing when you have the opportunity,Guess I will just make this bookmarked.2
I was very pleased to find this web-site.I wanted to thanks for your time for this wonderful read!! I definitely enjoying every little bit of it and I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff you blog post.
I’m still learning from you, while I’m trying to achieve my goals. I certainly enjoy reading everything that is written on your blog.Keep the posts coming. I loved it!
Hello. magnificent job. I did not anticipate this. This is a excellent story. Thanks!
I have been exploring for a little for any high-quality articles or blog posts in this kind of house . Exploring in Yahoo I at last stumbled upon this website. Reading this information So i am glad to convey that I’ve a very good uncanny feeling I discovered just what I needed. I such a lot without a doubt will make certain to don’t fail to remember this web site and provides it a look regularly.
Hi, I think your site might be having browser compatibility issues. When I look at your website in Safari, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, fantastic blog!
very good post, i definitely love this web site, keep on it
I really value your work, Great post.
Do you have a spam issue on this blog; I also am a blogger, and I was wanting to know your situation; many of us have developed some nice practices and we are looking to exchange solutions with other folks, please shoot me an email if interested.
Way cool, some valid points! I appreciate you making this article available, the rest of the site is also high quality. Have a fun.
Wohh precisely what I was looking for, regards for putting up.
Some genuinely excellent posts on this website , thanks for contribution.
Just want to say your article is as amazing. The clarity in your post is just great and i can assume you are an expert on this subject. Fine with your permission allow me to grab your RSS feed to keep updated with forthcoming post. Thanks a million and please continue the gratifying work.
Wow! Thank you! I permanently wanted to write on my website something like that. Can I take a part of your post to my website?
A person necessarily assist to make seriously posts I would state. That is the first time I frequented your website page and up to now? I surprised with the research you made to make this particular publish extraordinary. Fantastic job!
I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you create this website yourself? Plz reply back as I’m looking to create my own blog and would like to know wheere u got this from. thanks
I am now not sure the place you are getting your information, but great topic. I must spend some time finding out much more or understanding more. Thank you for excellent info I used to be searching for this info for my mission.