Ah, the Nigerian wedding season is here; where love is celebrated, and wallets are drained. You’re probably familiar with the dreaded Asoebi invite: the colorful fabric that comes with a hefty price tag and a sprinkle of entitlement.
If you’re tired of shelling out thousands of naira just to match with the bridal party, here are some cheeky tips to help you avoid spending too much on Asoebi.
DIY Your Makeup
Why pay a makeup artist when you’ve been watching all those YouTube tutorials? Sure, your eyeliner might end up looking like a cat walked across your face, but think of the money you’ll save! Plus, if anyone asks, just say you were going for a “bold, artistic look.”
Wear Something You Already Have
Who says you have to buy new fabric every time? Dig into your wardrobe and pull out that Asoebi from 2017. Fashion trends always come back around, right? With a little confidence, you’ll look like you’re setting the trend, not following it.
Miss the Bridal Shower
Bridal showers are where the expenses really start to add up—gifts, games, and often another outfit. “Sorry, I’ve got an urgent meeting,” or “My cat isn’t feeling well,” should do the trick. You’ll save on gifts, outfits, and time. Win-win!
Take Danfo Half the Way, Uber the Rest
Need to save on transport? Hop on a danfo for most of the journey, then switch to an Uber when you’re close to the venue. You’ll save cash and still arrive in style—no one needs to know how you got there! But errrm…be careful when hustling for bus o. Make your dress no go hook for danfo. And if for any reason it rains that day… well, sorry.
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Pretend You Didn’t Get the Memo
“Oh, was there a color theme? I must have missed that message!” Wear what you have and claim ignorance. You’ll still look fabulous without spending a kobo on new fabric.
Borrow Accessories
Need to complete your look? Borrow that wig, gele or earrings from a friend. Just remember to return them in one piece (and preferably not drenched in sweat from all the dancing). Also, if they drag you on twitter for doing borrow pose, don’t call my name o.
Say No to Extra Outfits
If the bride insists on two outfits; one for the ceremony and one for the reception, kindly remind her that you’re not Beyoncé. One outfit is enough, and your bank account will thank you. Nobody will beat you. The bride might sulk for a bit but las las, she go dey alright.
Claim the “Tailor Disappointment” Card
Okay fine, buy the fabric if you must. You can still avoid unplanned expenses by keeping the fabric until you can comfortably afford to have it sewn by a skilled fashion designer. We all know the classic excuse: “My tailor messed up the outfit.” Use it. No one will question it. Everyone knows that tailors and disappointment go hand-in-hand. Wear something else you have, and avoid the stress and expense of last-minute fittings. You’re welcome.
Offer to Help with the Planning
If you’re close to the bride, offer to help with the wedding planning. It’s hard work, but you might just earn a free pass on the Asoebi purchase. Who’s going to charge their right-hand helper for fabric? This one is 50-50 sha o. They might already have a planner. Also, you could help with the planning and still collect ela.
The Late Arrival Strategy
Show up fashionably late when everyone is too busy dancing to notice what you’re wearing. By then, the Asoebi will be the last thing on anyone’s mind!
Remember, weddings are about celebrating love, not breaking the bank. With these tips, you can enjoy the festivities without the financial strain. After all, your presence is the real gift!
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